Plus One
by sssweet-disposition
Summary: "you invited me to your brother's/sister's wedding as a plus one bc we're hella best friends but we end up making out at the afterparty and now everyone thinks we're fucking so uh,, u wanna go out for a drink sometime? try this whole couple thing out?" au except everyone already thinks it beforehand (thank you mutual pining) and just wishes they'd hurry it up already.
1. The Engagement

When Anya tells her sister that she's getting married Lexa takes her out to the bar so that they can celebrate. Anya and Gustus have been together for longer than she can remember and the whole entire Woods family has loved him from the beginning. She's loved him from the start and is even able to say that she sees him as an older brother. As soon as he stepped into their home two years ago, she knew he was different from all of the previous potentials; it was always serious. Lexa's always known, just by the way he looks at her sister, that he would stick around. He's fiercely loyal and caring, and she can't see her sister spending her life with anyone other than Gustus.

It's this special thing that he and Anya have that gives Lexa hope and it's one of the things that kept her going after Costia – after she was gone and Lexa had thought she just wasn't cut out for love. That she wasn't meant to be loved.

She wants a love like her parents. A love like Anya and Gustus. A love that's always cherished and won't leave. Eventually she knows she'll find it.

And then there's Clarke Griffin. There's always been Clarke. Always making sure she never got off of the right track. Best friends since diapers who learnt everything together from riding bikes to the fact that love presented itself through friendship as well. Always holding a special place in Lexa's heart. Always telling her that Costia never deserved the way she moved mountains for her. Always reminding her that she's more than good enough and "Someday someone will be there and treat you so much better, Lex".

People like Anya and Clarke? They deserve that and much more, so she always does her best to show she cares because she knows that loving someone who doesn't love you back is perhaps the most terrible thing to be accustomed to.

The night Costia had left it was Clarke who she called immediately after. It was only ten minutes later that her hair was being touched by gentle hands while her head was in the blonde's lap.

Months after her break-up with Costia, the realization had finally hit her and she had tried to shovel the feelings deep enough for them to stay down. Tried to tell herself that it only seems appealing because Clarke knows her, she's been there for her, been her rock since longer than she can even remember. She tried to bury it until it didn't want to be buried anymore. Until she had to just admit it to herself and have it become something that was very real. What had started out as a friendship for her certainly wasn't now.

It couldn't be. Not with the way her fingers itched to run through her soft golden hair. Not with the way her laugh is something Lexa always wants to bring out. Not with the way her hugs make her feel safer than she's ever felt. And definitely not with the way a friendly "I love you" from Clarke's mouth makes her head spin more than hearing it from Costia ever had.

Lexa's sure that she loves her more than anything she's ever loved, but she won't tell her.

The one who stares with those beautiful blue eyes is a constant in her life as her best friend and Lexa thinks that she'll never have Clarke look at her the way she once saw her friend look at Finn. She's thankful she's long left him.

That cheating, no good bastard.

She's never been fond of him. Clarke knew this too ("I don't know why you guys can't just get along, Lex"), but for the sake of her best friend's happiness, Lexa tried to accept that he was what she wanted ("It means a lot to me that you're trying, Lex"). Really, she never could understand why Clarke would settle for something so dull.

Lexa's far from being devout to any religion, and she's not sure she believes in anything at all, but she thanks any amount of greater beings every day, because Clarke? Clarke deserves the whole universe and nothing less.

Clarke had gotten home earlier than Finn expected. Isn't that how it always goes in the television shows and movies? You'd think people would have the decency to actually full-heartedly love each other, not break people down and drag them along.

Finn admits to her that it wasn't the first time.

She spent that night with Clarke in the blonde's bed, an arm across her torso and fingers clutched tightly to her shirt while tears dripped from her cheeks. There's never an "I told you so". Clarke needs for someone to be there for her, not tell her that she spent the past year with someone so undeserving of her heart. She spent that night silently raging with anger and thinking of all the different ways she could hurt Finn Collins and get away with it.

* * *

When Lexa tells Clarke that Gustus finally proposed to Anya the blonde's heart warms with joy. She's known the Woods family longer than she can even recall and can distinctly remember Lexa's sister being witness to majority of the friendship her and Lexa have. She's happy for Anya and she's equally happy for her best friend because she knows how much Lexa needs this. How much she needs to see that true love isn't fleeting. She knows the brunette has looked to her sister's relationship with wonder and amazement and longing. She knows it's been something that's kept her going.

Lexa has been there for her through thick and thin. She's never judged her, always supported her choices, and always made sure she knows eventually someone will come along and treat her better than Finn ever did. She knew Lexa wasn't his biggest fan, but despite her dislike, she put aside her differences and never even gave her an "I told you so" when it all went wrong.

Costia could have been good for Lexa. She hates to admit it, but other than the fact that she dropped everything and left Lexa for the journalism opportunity in Kandahar, she actually was a decent person. However, she saw what her leaving did to the brunette. Saw how much it pained her to love someone twice as much as they loved her. Saw Lexa pour her whole self and then some into a relationship that was borderline one-sided. The night it happened, she let her fingers run through Lexa's wavy brown hair while she silently sobbed just ten minutes after Costia had left for the airport.

A few months after she left Finn (That cheating mother fucker) is when she finally realized that the reason there was always slight jealousy towards Costia was never just because she took up more of Lexa's time.

"Someday someone will be there and treat you so much better, Lex".


	2. 5 Months until the Wedding

Today on her day off, Clarke finds herself holed up in her spare room painting with sad blues and ugly greys.

Though Anya is two years older, Clarke remembers her best friend's sister always being around during her life while growing up.

She remembers when they were six and Anya would take both her and Lexa to the park and play with them – even though she acted like she hated doing so. Remembers her having to share a room with the two best friends during the "Annual Woods Family Cottage Trip". Remembers that one time when she was twelve and Anya accidentally kicked her off the tree branch causing her to break her arm (She never lets the older Woods forget it). She remembers Anya telling her, "Your art matters, Clarke. Have you seen the dumb smile it puts on that one's face?" (She pointed at Lexa).

So yeah, Clarke is a little upset she hasn't gotten an invite to the wedding, but Lexa told her that she thinks it's just something small and that she knows Anya is still trying to get invitations out, so she tries not to let it bother her very much.

* * *

The sound of her heels clicking against the floor is the only thing heard in the hallway until the ringing from her pocket starts. Plucking it from her jacket, she takes a quick look at the caller ID before swiping her finger across the screen.

"Hey, An".

"Hey, Squirt".

Despite knowing her sister can't see her, Lexa rolls her eyes. "Anya, I know you're well aware that I'm 26". She reaches her apartment door and slides the key through the keyhole. Although she doesn't mind being dressed more proper for work, she's itching to change into more comfortable clothes.

"How was work?"

"Everyone I work with is an imbecile".

The woman on the other end of the line chuckles before replying. "So the same shit but different day is what you're telling me. You'd think that hotshot lawyers would actually be at least somewhat intelligent".

"It baffles me every day".

"Listen, I have to make this quick because Gus and I have to go try some cakes. You should bring a plus one to the wedding".

Lexa makes her way to her room and puts the phone on speaker so that she can change in to her favourite pair of sweats and out of her dress pants.

She already knows where Anya is trying to take the conversation. Sometimes she wishes she hadn't told her, just so that she wouldn't have to be teased about it all of the time ("Great job, Lex. You've fallen in love with your best friend and now you can't stop picturing her naked, can you?" _Insert Anya's ugly smug face here_ ).

(Lexa does struggle sometimes).

Lexa remembers the night vividly. Remembers that she'd sprinted through the rain to Anya's apartment right after Clarke had left their weekly night of binging scary movies because Finn called and said he had a surprise for her. They had been cuddled together on the couch, Clarke having her shirt in a deathly grip and hiding her face in Lexa's neck when her phone interrupted the film.

(The surprise wasn't necessarily for her)(He wanted to show off his new Mercedes).

(Clarke couldn't stand being paraded around in it).

She remembers her tears mixing with the rain and hoping her sister wouldn't notice the tremble in her voice when she told her Clarke is more than what Finn ever deserved. When she told her that if Clarke were hers to love for the rest of her life then she'd move through hell and high water to make sure Clarke knows. Remembers that after spending the night on her sister's couch with tear-stained cheeks she told herself head over heart because anything more would ruin what they've built; she can't risk losing the biggest positive that she has in her life to something as terrible as unrequited love. She'd rather have Clarke as a friend than as nothing at all.

She decides to play dumb even though she already understands what her sister is suggesting. "A plus one? But there is no plus one".

"Well you can bring Clarke".

She knew it.

"She's practically part of the family anyway. It'd be weird _not_ having her there".

The only thing Lexa can do is groan in defeat as she pulls her favourite hoodie over her head. It's a faded navy blue hoodie that fits her snugly with "Heda" printed on the back – a childhood nickname given during their war game Trikru versus Skaikru – that Clarke got her before they both parted for university. (Clarke has one to match with "Wanheda" on hers). She knows that Anya is right. Clarke's been there for so many different Woods family events and everyone always welcomes her as if she is one herself.

"Think about it. You can drool over how pretty she'll look and you both can dance together, and maybe you can even tell her how you feel".

"Okay Anya, this has been great and I absolutely love when you remind me of things I don't want to be reminded of, but I'm going to hang up now". She barely hears Anya's hurried "Ask her" before the call is ended.

* * *

It's been two days since the call with her sister and she's managed to only scrape by at work because she's been so distracted by trying to give herself a pep talk before calling Clarke. Now that Anya straightforwardly insisted on the blonde's presence she knows she can't keep avoiding it, so she picks up her phone and calls.

The line only rings twice before it's answered.

"Wow, Lexa Woods is actually alive and decided to grace me with a phone call. I was thinking of sending out a search party or something".

In her attempt to work herself up to asking, she has to admit that she'd been kind of avoiding Clarke.

It wasn't her brightest idea, but she knows that if she were to take one look at those gorgeous eyes while being so ill-prepared then she would have surely accidentally made the invite sound more like a _date date_ , not just a date, and then Lexa's embarrassment would've just gone downhill from there.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry. Work's been kicking my ass a little, there's this new deal we've been trying to settle".

"I don't believe that for a second. There's no way my best friend – and probably best lawyer ever – would have her ass kicked. I'm also sure you'd kick ass right back. Have you seen you?"

She decides to just rip off the Band-Aid. "I have a question for you, Clarke".

"Ooh, I have serious Lexa today. Go ahead".

"It's been brought to my attention that you should be my plus one for Anya and Gus' wedding since she practically watched us both grow up attached to one another…And it's not like a _date_ , just, you know, a date. Me and you, but not me _and_ you, you know?"

She decides to leave out the part where Anya had texted her after their phone call to say that Lexa absolutely needs to ask her because her sister was going to just outright give Clarke her own invitation but decided it'd be much better (Damn Anya and her need to embarrass her constantly) if she forced Lexa to ask if she'd be her date.

In short, because it's like some sort of unspoken Woods family rule, Clarke had to be there.

"Plus, since O is practically married to Lincoln already she'll be there too. I think Bell and Echo have something going on, so maybe he'll show up as well". Lexa is rambling. It's a nervous trait which she absolutely loathes because she knows Clarke always catches it (She says she thinks it's adorable), but for the life of her she can't stop (Come to think of it though, what is with her friends and her family all mixing together?). "And I know Niylah and Ray are just testing things out but An said she's pretty sure –"

"Lex, slow down". Her giggle makes the brunette's heart beat a little faster and Lexa curses the fact that she's begun being this affected by her. "I'd be more than happy to go. Even as your _not date_ date".

"Yeah?" Honestly for some reason she made up about a thousand situations in her head where Clarke said no…Now all those reasons just seem stupid and Lexa wants to roll her eyes at herself. (This is _Clarke_. Of course she'd want to go, _idiot_ ).

"A chance to dress up nice, drink, and dance with my favourite person? Of course I'd be there".

"Your favourite person?"

"Wow Lex, for a lawyer you're not really on the ball right now".

Later, their conversation ends with Lexa's cheeks still a crimson colour from being reminded that she's Clarke's favourite person.

* * *

When Clarke hangs up the phone she feels a slight pull in her chest.

Don't get her wrong, the blonde loves weddings and she's more than happy that she'll be in attendance at Anya and Gustus' big day. She hoped to be able to go because not for anything, but she expected to be invited. Hoped to see everyone mingle and be happy (and see Lexa get dressed up).

The thing tugging her heart though? It's that Lexa had to be told to bring her along rather than having her best friend automatically wanting her there at her side. _Date_ or otherwise.

When she calls Bellamy later to tell him the news he answers with, "Wait. Why wouldn't Anya just address it to the both of you? Isn't it assumed you guys are going together since you're a couple?" followed up by, "Oh shit. Clarke, I'm sorry. I thought – never mind". The last of his bumbling is him swearing to her "That girl looks at you like you put the stars in the sky".

Platonically? Sure. Anything else though? She doesn't quite understand it and it only makes her heart hurt more.

(With some help eventually Clarke will come to see it too)


	3. 3 Months until the Wedding

"You know, ever since Little Woods asked you to be her date you guys have been pretty chummy with each other. I mean, more than usual. Which - by the way - was already gross enough. Did you finally tell her that you have a big bisexual crush on her and now you guys are like, sleeping together or something?"

Raven is shoving chip after chip into her mouth while both her and Clarke watch Imagine Me & You for the hundredth time (They both love screaming "You're a wanker number nine!" okay?). The brunette's words are muffled from the abundance of food in her mouth and Clarke wishes she couldn't decipher anything her friend said, but she can.

"Nothing's going on with Lex and I". She tries to say it as calmly as possible and avoids eye contact with her friend, instead trying to focus on the movie in front of her.

No matter how many times her friends keep bothering her to tell the brunette the truth about how she feels she just can't bring herself to have the conversation with Lexa. ("Clarke, I'm pretty sure I've seen her literally drool over you") (Are you freaking kidding me, Griffin? She talks about you like, 24/7").

She can't risk losing another person who means so much to her. She'll have Lexa in her life whichever way life gives her.

She knows it's not fair to her best friend, but for the rest of the week she starts taking extra shifts at the hospital to keep any questions or comments from Raven and Octavia at bay. Effectively, not seeing Lexa also helps her stomp down at least somewhat of the various unfriendly feelings she harbours for her (Just don't count two nights before when she was mere inches from the brunette's damn beautiful face).

* * *

 **Raven: dude, im like 99% sure clarkey and woods are banging**

 **Octavia: i'll get it out of one of them later tonight**

* * *

 **Anya: So, when are you going to tell me the truth about what I accidentally walked in on a couple nights ago?**

 **Lexa: It's the same story I gave you the first hundred times. We were being stupid, Clarke threw the pillow at my face and the corner hit my eye. She grabbed my face to get a closer look and make sure I was okay.**

 **Anya: I still don't believe you.**

* * *

As Maid of Honour, Lexa throws Anya a bachelorette party. Because her sister insisted not to go all out for it, the get together is just something small at Lexa's apartment with the girls in Anya's wedding party. She was going to ask for Clarke's help, but she knew that lately she was really busy working extra rounds at the hospital and it's been taking a lot out of the blonde. (Not seeing her at least helps to ensure that she won't at any point babble out her undying love).

She later regrets asking Raven for help and makes mental note to ask Octavia – the only sensible one – next time she needs party-planning aid.

Halfway through the party and a couple drinks in, she curses herself for the fact that Octavia squeezing her hand is what shakes her out of the jealous haze from seeing the strippers enjoying Clarke's playfulness a little too much. There's one in particular, _Juan_ (If that even _is_ his real name), who decides to hang around the blonde too often for Lexa's liking. She realizes that with the white-knuckled grip on her champagne glass it's no wonder the other brunette is looking at her worryingly. "Lex, come help me fill some more glasses in the kitchen".

Wordlessly following, Lexa mentally prepares for whatever might happen. Her friend has the tendency to want to know everything that's happening around her. Octavia pulls her out of earshot from the rest of the party and turns towards her, arms crossing and face turning into that 'no bullshit face' she's been on the receiving end of plenty of times.

"Is there something going on with you and Clarke?" Straight to the point.

Lexa can handle this. She decides to feign ignorance. "Me and Clarke? What do you mean?"

"Dumb doesn't look good on you, Lexa".

She knows the fact that she decided to be a lawyer is currently betraying her. The truth just seems to leak out in every which way possible. Anya's right, she's always been a terrible liar. For a second she actually considers somewhat letting Octavia in (Curse the alcohol) but knows it's unwise because then Raven would know and then Clarke would too. She doesn't want to talk about her feelings now in the middle of the kitchen while her sister's party is still going on in the other room, so she continues her façade no matter how unbelievable it may seem. "Octavia, I honestly have no clue what you're trying to get at here, so if you'll excuse me I'm going to go back to the living room".

Both girls go back to the others without the extra drinks.

* * *

 **Octavia: couldn't get it out of woods but you're right. it's totally happening**

 **Raven: ten bucks says woods is a bottom**

 **Octavia: ever heard of a service top?**

* * *

 **Anya: Please don't miss your maid of honour speech because you and Clarke are too busy sucking faces.**

It's been one of those days and it's still only the morning.

Lexa refuses to entertain her sister with a response.

 **Anya: Wanna tell me what was bothering you last night at the party?**

 **Anya: It was the stripper all over your girlfriend wasn't it?**

 ***** ** _Call from_** **Anya***

 ***** ** _Missed call from_** **Anya***

 **Anya: You're doing her right now, aren't you...?**

 **Anya: STAY SAFE LOVEBIRDS**

Lexa calls Anya back to attempt telling her to quit her antics.

It doesn't work.

* * *

It's two days after the bachelorette party when Clarke gets a call from Anya. It makes her slightly worried because generally the only way they communicate when they're not with each other is through text.

"Is Lex okay?"

"What? Yeah. Yeah, she's fine. I wanted to know if you want to go out for breakfast".

"Just the two of us?"

"Yes Griffin, just the two of us".

"Me and you?"

"Have you started drinking already?"

The blonde is immediately weary that something is happening. This breakfast invite feels like it's purposeful. If she and Anya are ever together it's usually in a group setting with Lexa involved. _Always_ with Lexa involved.

She agrees anyway because her growling stomach tells her she's incredibly hungry. She's also desperately going to need caffeine.

Half an hour later, the two are sitting across from each other in a small diner around the corner from Clarke's apartment, Clarke opting for a stack of pancakes (Which she's currently drowning in syrup) ("Clarke that's fucking disgusting") while Anya chooses to have a whole concoction of breakfast items ("Are you getting married because you're pregnant?") ("No, you idiot") ("You can't be mean to me. You broke my arm") ("It was 13 years ago!").

"What's the deal with you and my sister?"

There it is. The reason Clarke's sitting in this diner having breakfast alone with Anya. To be interrogated – _once again_ – about her and Lexa.

"What do you mean?" She's curious. She wants to know what Anya knows – _if_ she knows anything at all.

"Are you guys a thing?" Seemingly, Lexa's sister appears to be just as out of the loop as everyone else.

Clarke sighs for the millionth time over this topic. "No, we're just friends". She pushes a piece of her food around her plate. There's only so much her heart can take and constantly being remided of her one-sided love doesn't exactly make her feel the greatest. Everyone keeps asking about her and Lexa. If Clarke could, she'd shout to the rooftops that they're together, but she can't. Because they're not.

Clearly Anya catches something in her disheartened tone. "But you don't want to be" she tries.

The blonde hesitates for a moment before replying. She knows there's no point in arguing with her, or even trying to play dumb. Anya always has a way of getting things out of her somehow. Especially if she uses that damn death glare (Seriously, is it a Woods thing?). For whatever reason, she knows she can trust the woman sitting across from her. Truthfully, she's genuinely surprised that she hadn't told her any sooner.

"No". Her voice is small and vulnerable when she responds, still not meeting Anya's eyes.

"What the hell am I going to do with you guys?" the brunette mutters, more to herself than to Clarke. "Griffin, be an adult and look at me for a second".

She feels like a child, readying herself to be scolded. She places her fork down and looks at Anya.

"I want you to really think about what I'm going to say, okay?"

The blonde nods and takes a deep breath.

"My sister would move the moon and the stars for you, Clarke. Don't make her wait to find someone else and have her heart settle on something she only sees as second best. She deserves to have someone who will give her more than just a half-assed love. The both of you do".

She groans in response. "What does that even mean?"

"Life should be about more than just surviving".

* * *

Clarke spends her night thinking of what Anya told her. Spends her night thinking of all the memories she's shared with Lexa. Of all the times Lexa so casually told her she loved her. All the times it had been more than just a casual and friendly declaration. Lexa and that damn beautiful smirk and those shimmering green eyes. Lexa, who has meant everything to Clarke for longer than she can remember, thinks of her as everything as well.

She only gets about 4 hours of a decent sleep because her heart feels so full that it's ready to burst.

She's going to do it. She's going to tell Lexa exactly what she means to her.


	4. The Wedding:PI

Both hands on the wheel and eyes closed, Lexa takes another deep breath in before letting it back out of her lungs. She's been sitting in her parked car outside of her friend's apartment building for the past ten minutes trying to gather her bearings. To say that she's nervous about the wedding is an understatement. Okay, not nervous about the wedding per se. Her pounding heart and the constant jump of her leg are the nerves kicking in from knowing that the woman she loves is a few floors up in her home – probably looking gorgeous as ever – waiting on her to be escorted as her date to said wedding.

It feels important and presumptuous no matter how much she tries to think otherwise. Clarke has been around her family plenty of times, but not like this. Not as her date to something as romantic as a wedding. Not as her date to something as important as her sister's big day. It's not just a family barbeque or her cousin's sixteenth birthday.

She tries once again to will her brain to focus.

She can do this. No one will think they're together as a couple. Her brain is just being absolutely rude and projecting what she wishes it would be like.

All she has to do today is remember: This day is supposed to be totally 100% friendly and platonic.

"Right" she breathes. The brunette gives her head a nod, readying herself and taking a final deep breath as she opens her door and steps out.

Lexa rounds the corner of the hallway and reaches the wooden door that reads 13 much quicker than she had hoped. Before knocking she pulls her sleeve lightly and glances at the watch on her wrist (Another gift from Clarke). She's still five minutes early. She purposely left early in order to allot herself time to get her mess of a self together.

All at once and without her knocking beforehand, the door swings open revealing Clarke in a beautiful black dress that falls to the end of her thighs and hugs her curves perfectly. Her lips are red with lipstick and her blue eyes seem even more prominent – they're always captivating.

"Hey! Sorry, I was just putting on my heels and I heard someone stop at the door so I figured it was you".

Holy hell, if Lexa wasn't already in love with this woman in front of her then she sure as hell would be falling so hard right now. "I uh, hey. Hi" she cringes at her stutter and attempts to smile before starting over. "You look absolutely breathtaking, Clarke" the brunette says as she shakes her head in disbelief. There are so many words she'd use to describe her friend right now that not even calling her breathtaking seems to do justice to the beauty in front of her.

"Why thank you, Ms. Woods. You're looking pretty dapper yourself in that suit. And wow Lex, suspenders were a nice touch. Hold on, just -"

Clarke's hands are wrapped around Lexa's black tie a second later. As she straightens out the piece of fabric Lexa takes a moment to appreciate the beautiful flow of her friend's hair which is pulled up in a bun except for the two parts in the front which she let hang loose. She's trying to focus on something other than reeling at the fact that Clarke's action has sent her a slight step closer and caused their faces to be in _very_ close proximity. When she's done, the blonde lets one hand trail slightly down the front of her white dress shirt.

"There. Perfect and ready to make some hearts melt" (Lexa doesn't know Clarke's own heart is one of them). She stares up at Lexa, not distancing herself from the woman across from her.

The brunette is fully aware of the heightened heart palpitations going on inside of her chest and the warmth that's settling on her cheeks. Deciding that she needs fresh air soon or else she may just combust she clears her throat before stepping back and offering out her hand. "Ready to go?"

"Lead the way, Stud".

* * *

She's seen pictures of Lexa donning a suit, but it's apparent now that a measly picture hardly compares to being beside her and quite literally seeing her in one. Her posture is different. Her words seem to all have an air of much more confidence. She looks almost like some sort of business regality. It does things to Clarke and she inwardly curses being so damn attracted to it (She's never seen Lexa working at the firm but now she's incredibly sure that she'd be more than unprepared to see her friend sitting studiously behind her work desk). With one hand on the wheel and the other resting on the stick shift Lexa looks…hot. It's one of the only clear thoughts her distracted brain has come up with at the moment (She's trying so hard not to stare. Not to mentally undress her friend).

(So. Fucking. Hard.)

She feels so suffocated in the car sitting beside Lexa looking the way she does that Clarke needs something to take her mind off of the rapidly burning heat she's feeling come over her.

"Mind if I play some music, Lex?"

"Of course not".

She chances a look at the brunette only to find a smile on her face. Her face that's currently pointed right in her direction. Her heartbeat seems to pick up and she smiles back before pulling out her phone to connect it.

"Here we go. Fitting since we're going to a wedding". Soon the music is flowing through the car speakers and Clarke sits back, letting the soothing sound calm her messy thoughts.

 _I've put diamonds on my promises so you know that they will stay_

 _And on your finger is where my vow will live_

 _So you can see it every day_

Clarke's resting her elbow on the door, fist propping up her head as she watches the buildings quickly zoom by her view. She's humming the tune of the song and she sneaks a look at Lexa again. On the steering wheel the brunette's finger is tapping away to the beat and she's quietly murmuring the song lyrics, probably not even realizing she's doing so.

 _It's all for love_

 _It's all for love_

 _I will do anything for my love_

Clarke decides to sing along.

She'll tell Lexa, but later. Despite it being a great moment, she has it all planned out in her mind and right now she just needs to keep this mood between them. Hopefully have Lexa's heart fluttering for as long as she can before the time comes.

"I carry your story wherever I may go cause I know it will be mine. Until the end of time even if we disagree know I'll still be on your side".

The warm hand that she feels snake under her own slightly startles her from singing but she composes herself quickly and refuses to look down at the perfection she'd probably find. She can already feel it as Lexa slides their fingers together.

 _It's all for love_

 _It's all for love_

 _I will do anything for my love_

 _I will do anything for your love_

It's not unusual for them to hold hands. They're best friends. They've gotten used to (In some capacity) the friendly physical connections. The gesture makes Clarke smile and she looks to Lexa who's looking back at her again. They both grin and sing together for the rest of the song.

"Give you my hand. I'll give you all I've saved for. Through all the joy and all the disappointment. And you alone will be the one I live for".

 _It's all for love_

 _It's all for love_

 _I will do anything for your love_

 _It's all for love_

 _It's all for love_

 _I will do anything for my love_

 _I will do anything for your love_

* * *

The ceremony is outdoors at the Wood's family cottage which means that Lexa had an entire hour and a half in the car with Clarke listening to some of the most romantic songs she's ever heard; it made her heart swell.

The yard is big enough to seat everyone on cute wooden picnic chairs set up in rows for the makeshift church pews while leaving enough space for the tables where everyone will be seated afterward. Off to the far end where there's room to dance, the surrounding trees are decorated with light bulbs hanging from the branches which Lexa believes will cast a beautiful dim glow among everyone once the sun begins to set.

Taking her place as maid of honour and standing beside her sister while listening to the ceremony, the brunette gazes around at the surrounding decorations which all seem to come together so effortlessly. She looks at the aisle where Anya had been led by their dad, the red rose petals scattered across the ground making everything look even more perfect. Her gaze goes through the crowd of friends and family, eyes landing on her parents. Her mother's arm looped through her father's. His face trying to seem composed. He looks proud. Looks happy. Looks like he knows with all his heart that Gustus is the right person for Anya. He always did have an eye for these things. It makes Lexa wonder if he'll look at her the same way on her wedding. Makes her hope that the love Gustus is given by her parents is the same love given to the one standing across from her on her own big day.

Her eyes unknowingly move on and land on Clarke who's watching the ceremony intently as Anya says her vows. She thinks about how much she wants to have this with someone. How much she wants to share this happiness with Clarke. It makes her heart ache as she watches her friend wipe away a tear that managed to escape. The blonde has always talked about how much she looks forward to experiencing this magical moment with the person she loves.

Lexa makes a promise to herself right at that moment that she'll never think of love as weakness again. With love being a bond that is so emotionally invested she can only see the strength that it provides. When she looks at Clarke she understands that there's no weakness in wanting to give herself wholly to someone one day. No weakness in wanting to give herself wholly to Clarke.

She'll tell her friend. There's no definitive time or place, but she will at some point because this truth is also something Clarke deserves.


	5. The Wedding:PII

Everyone is milling around and talking amongst one another excitedly. She loves the light and happy feeling that weddings give. It's a time of celebration and a time to embrace the feeling of love. It's a time that allows people to reflect on what they themselves already have or would like to have. Clarke? Clarke eagerly wants to welcome the kind of love Anya and Gustus have and give it back tenfold to the person who holds her heart. She's been inspired by their relationship since the beginning of it. She's hoped that she'd find that sort of happiness in someone. The kind that gives you the desire to be a better version of you for not only the one you love but also yourself. She never felt that with Finn. Her first work in being better for herself should have been kicking his sorry ass to the curb before she had to find out the truth about him the hard way. She should have noticed the warnings. Should have realized that Lexa had all the right not to like that son of a –. Lexa always tells her not to dwell on it. Not to think of what she "should have done". ("None of this was your fault, Clarke. He's a fucking fool for messing up what he had. You're the most incredible person I know, Clarke").

Standing here and watching all of the joy? She knows that she would have never been as happy as Anya and Gus if it were Finn. If it can be Lexa though? She'd be over the moon.

"Clarke! It's so nice to see you again!" The Woods family genes never seem to stray far apart. Echo, Lexa's older cousin by two years, is one of the many that seem to have the chiseled jawline, beautiful skin tone, and impeccable stature.

"Yeah, you too!" she responds kindly before turning to Bellamy who's looking at her shyly. He's not one to be tied down, so the fact that he's chosen to join Echo is quite telling. (You all knew he was screwed since the beginning). "Well, well, well. I'm not going to say I'm surprised, but I will say I'm happy to see you here".

"Alright Princess, let it all out. I know, this is payback".

Echo looks between her and Bellamy, chuckling before lightly resting her hand on the blonde's shoulder. "There must be something in this Woods DNA that's so irresistible; I'm definitely not complaining about it though. It seems to even have managed to get a hold on Octavia and Raven. And you too, Clarke" she winks. "I'm sure Little Lex definitely doesn't have any qualms about being a Woods if the genes at least swung a girlfriend like you her way".

She can hear Bellamy nearly choking on his wine after the comment is passed. He composes himself and wipes at his mouth before chancing a look Clarke's way. She refuses to let it get under her skin, keeping her facial expression relatively calm as it was beforehand.

"Oh, no, we're not together". She tries to politely put it out there that she and Lexa aren't dating. Silently in her head she thinks _hopefully just not yet_.

"Oh. Oh my gosh, Clarke I'm so sorry. You're just always at these family things with her and you're all she ever talks about, so I just assumed…Actually, I think we may have all assumed so apologies in advance for any other Woods that brings it up".

* * *

Quickly searching through the mess of dancing people, Clarke tries to get a glimpse of her friend. They've always joked about this. About how it'd be funny to just get drunk and ditch a wedding. Clarke is aware however that it's Lexa's sister's wedding, so she'll make sure that they won't be getting absolutely plastered and miss the rest of the evening completely. She just thinks they both need a little extra fun. From the corner of her eye she sees the familiar brunette waves and her feet automatically move towards her. As she gets closer she can see that Lexa is standing with Raven and Niylah, listening intently to something Raven is saying to her.

"…think it's something with the carburetor –"

"Hey guys!" She places her hand at the small of Lexa's back, earning herself Lexa's attention. "Would you mind if I stole my date for a little bit?" Clarke grins widely at the confused look on her friend's face. Lexa's always so put together and proper that sometimes it's funny to see the adorable look she has when she's not sure of what's happening.

"You disgust me, Griffin. I'm also slightly impressed by the blunt and 'fuck it' attitude. She's all yours. Please wash your hands after".

For the sake of not having to explain herself again, Clarke lets the comment slide with only a role of her eyes directed to her friend. She smiles at both Niylah and Raven before taking Lexa's hand in her own and leading her away.

("I'm not entirely surprised they're going off to have sex right now")("Honestly Niylah, I'm more surprised we didn't beat them to it").

"Uh Clarke, where are we going?"

On their way past the table with copious drinks, Clarke snags a bottle of champagne and pulls Lexa along faster. "Quick, Lex". The genuine giggle that sounds from Lexa's lips is like a song to Clarke's ears. She remembers hearing it for the first time when she learnt that her friend is so easily ticklish, but this type of giggle is different. It's carefree and brings Clarke back to when they were just kids. When Lexa would tell her to quit making funny faces at her because "I'm the Commander, Clarke. I'm a warrior. We don't laugh". In reality that's all they did when they were kids. Somehow, they always seemed to bring it out of each other.

She finds herself dragging her to the willow tree that's always been big enough for the both of them to hide behind and brings the brunette to sit on the ground with her. They'd sit by it for hours dreaming up stories and gazing at the passing clouds or the vibrant starry night. "I think it's time we cross this one off our bucket list".

"I like the way you think, Clarke". The smile on her face is radiating.

She loves the way her name sounds coming from Lexa. Clarke brings the bottle to her lips and takes a generous swig before passing it off to the brunette. "Let's play never have I ever".

She watches distractedly as the rim of the bottle hits Lexa's admittedly beautiful lips, her tongue slightly peeking out to touch the tip. "Are we back in college?"

"Don't be such a party pooper".

"Hah, that's funny because I'm pretty sure you actually did say that to me at a party once, Party Girl Griffin". The nickname earns her shoulder a shove from Clarke.

"Oh gosh, please don't remind me". But she does remember all the parties. All the booze, the make outs, the body shots, being undefeated at beer pong with Raven ("It's all easy physics"). She recalls the nights when she was too out of her mind that she would refuse to leave without feeling safely with her best friend. Lexa would have to drive across town to pick her up and she would take her back to her place where the brunette would let her rest her head on her shoulder and drift off to sleep with fingers running through her hair. Not once did Lexa complain.

"Alright, I guess I'll start then". Her lips purse together while she thinks of what to say. "Never have I ever cheated on a test".

Clarke chuckles quietly and takes the bottle out of Lexa's hand. "Come on Lex, we can't use such lame questions".

"You're just saying that because I have the incredibly easy potential to get you to drink this entire bottle all by yourself".

She gasps and throws her hand on her heart. "I'm so offended. I know your secrets, Woods. Don't you worry", she grins. "Never have I ever gone skinny dipping".

"I hate you".

"You love me".

Something flashes across Lexa's face and Clarke's sure she's hit the nail on what Anya had told her. She watches as her friend clears her throat and looks in front of her to the lake in the distance. "Never have I ever had sex with one of my friends".

"Ugh, please don't hold that over me. _Both_ Raven and I want to leave it way, way, _way_ in the past". Lexa's still looking across the field and Clarke finds herself mesmerized by her side profile. She's asked Lexa to be her model for a painting plenty of times. (There are also times when she finds her hand moving across the page only to realize once her piece is complete that she has somehow unknowingly incorporated her friend). Her hand itches to grasp her pencil and sketch this moment. Lexa's hair is gently moving in the breeze, her lashes are perfectly curved, her eyes are glowing where the sun shines on them. She doesn't realize she's doing it before her hand feels the softness of Lexa's brown hair and it's already being brushed back behind her ear. The touch jostles Lexa from wherever her mind had been and she turns to look at Clarke who keeps her hand touching the brunette, carefully drawing it to rest on Lexa's cheek.

Screw the plan with the walk through the forest to their old hidden hide out. This is it. This is one of those moments. She should tell her now. Clarke can't wait any longer. All she needs to do is –

In the background she can hear Lexa's mom calling out for her. She takes a deep breath and tries to get a hold of her rapidly beating heart, pulling her hand away in favour of playing with the label on the champagne bottle.

"Duty calls".

* * *

Everyone has been dancing for quite a while now and even though Lexa doesn't particularly enjoy doing so (Lie) (She's also good at it), she was most definitely conned into doing so by Octavia and Lincoln and even had a fun time doing so. When the DJ announces that he wants to slow things down she's thankful for the chance to catch her breath for a couple of minutes and maybe head for a glass of something cold.

Before she manages to excuse herself from the couple Lincoln's hand is on her shoulder. "You should go find your girlfriend" he genuinely smiles.

Has this been going around her family so much to the point where even her cousins think they're together? Lexa thinks Octavia must've told him. She looks to the brunette in front of her who is smiling widely at her boyfriend's suggestion. "She's just right over there talking to your parents" Octavia points out, head nodding slightly towards where she sees Clarke is indeed talking to her mom and dad.

The sight that she sees – even so plain and not unlikely – makes her heart flutter slightly. "Excuse me" she says, not taking her eyes off the blonde.

Her parents see her approaching before Clarke does, offering her a smile as she gets closer. She snakes her hand across her friend's back like Clarke had done to her earlier and feels a shiver run through her warm body under her fingertips. When she looks at Lexa her eyes seem to soften and it takes all Lexa has not to just spit it all out right there.

"Alexandria, I was just telling Clarke here how much we've missed seeing you both at the cottage".

"Oh Viv," her father cuts in politely, "I'm sure they want to be out experiencing more things than just holing up in this cottage for a few days. You know, make new memories and such. Whatever the kids do these days".

"When we go back home why don't you both come over for a nice dinner. I'm very happy you've finally gotten your heads out of the water long enough to realize you love each other" Vivian smiles at her daughter.

She can feel her cheeks burning possibly more than they ever have. Even her parents think there's something going on between them. Have they always rooted for her and Clarke to get together? "Oh, Mom no –".

"Ah look, you embarrassed her Viv". Nyko throws his hand on top of Lexa's shoulder. "They haven't said it yet".

Nervously glancing at Clarke, Lexa notes that her friend seems to not be as embarrassed as she is. Instead, she's trying to hold back her amusement and seems like she'd even laugh.

"No, Mom, Dad, we're not a couple". She hears the music behind their conversation and hopes that there'll be another one to slow dance to because the familiar tune is almost at the end.

Her father's eyebrows knit together and her mother looks slightly disbelieving.

"Sure Honey" is the only response that comes out of Vivian's mouth and it causes Lexa's eyes to widen. They really do believe that Clarke is her girlfriend. She's sure that her friend's silence is only making the matter worse but she can't be bothered to try and correct them because she thankfully hears another slower song starting and if she doesn't dance gracefully with Clarke in her arms at least once in her lifetime then she will be one very upset individual.

She clears her throat and turns to gaze at Clarke. "Care to dance?" she asks holding out her hand.

* * *

She has her arms thrown across Lexa's shoulders, hands linked together by her entwined fingers resting lightly behind the brunette's neck. Lexa's hands are unsure at her waist; barely there like she's afraid Clarke will freak out with anything more than just a gentle press. She knows that Lexa is speaking to her about something but she's not entirely sure what at this point. The last thing she remembers coming out of that beautiful mouth was something about how it had taken Anya two days full of shopping just to find the right dress. Right now she's too focused on the lyrics of the song their dancing to – she's always loved it – and the fact that she's pretty sure she can hear her heartbeat in her ears.

 _I can't keep up, and I can't back down_

 _I've been losing so much time_

She steps in closer and moves her arms inwards, hands moving to grip the edges of Lexa's suit. She hangs onto Lexa more firmly, their bodies pressed together and Clarke's forehead resting in the crook of Lexa's shoulder. The movement causes Lexa's hands to find purchase on her lower back and she can feel her friend ease into the touch, holding Clarke tighter to her. She's no longer talking and for a brief second, the blonde closes her eyes and lets the calm wash over her. There's never been a time she hasn't felt safe around the brunette. Never a time she hasn't been comforted by Lexa's mere presence.

 _'Cause it's you and me_

 _And all of the people with nothing to do_

 _Nothing to lose_

* * *

When Clarke moves in and rests her head on Lexa's shoulder all the words her brain had thought of spewing to continue her story suddenly disappears. She can smell the shampoo in her golden waves and the faint smell of a light perfume that she recognizes as Clarke's favourite hits her senses. The lack of space causes her hands to brush along her waist and settle on her lower back. With Clarke seemingly not needing distance between them, Lexa musters up an inkling of courage to strengthen the hold she has on her best friend.

 _And it's you and me_

 _And all the other people_

 _And I don't know why_

 _I can't keep my eyes off of you_

She's sure that the increase in her heartbeat is known to everyone around them. (She's sure Clarke can feel it pounding restlessly beneath her shirt). Nothing has ever felt more perfect and right than holding Clarke Griffin. As they're turning, her green eyes meet her sister's from across the sea of dancing people and they exchange lighthearted smiles. She thinks Anya has never looked more proud.

 _Why are the things that I want to say_

 _Just aren't coming out right?_

* * *

She can hear Lexa's gentle breath over the song and it soothes her. Reminds her of all the nights she had spent sharing Lexa's bed and being eased into a peaceful sleep. The quiet between them allows her mind to wander. To think about the fact that she could have this every day if she and the brunette work out their feelings. She could even marry her. (She would very much like to do so, but first she'll have to stick to the steps they have to cross that would lead there). Her thoughts are broken by the slight hum coming from the woman holding her. It frightens her how faultless she believes they are for one another. It excites her how much she knows without a doubt they could stay together for the rest of their lives.

 _I'm tripping on words_

 _You got my head spinning_

 _I don't know where to go from here_

Lexa humming the song makes this feel even more perfect than it already is and she's feeling impulsive. Feeling that she has to do it right here, right now. Plans to bring them to where she had carved their names on the tree more than ten years ago? Totally forgotten by the enjoyment of this grand moment. For a second, she fiddles with the soft fabric of Lexa's suit before moving to look at her.

 _'Cause it's you and me_

 _And all of the people people with nothing to do_

 _Nothing to prove_

When she meets green eyes she sees puzzlement in the way her eyebrows have furrowed. She then realizes that she stopped dancing and in turn, so had Lexa. She can see that her friend is about to say something – probably ask if she's okay – but before she can give her a chance to interrupt her bravery Clarke takes hold of her face gently (Ultimately making Lexa speechless once again) and inches closer. She's almost there when she feels Lexa's slim fingers wrap around her wrists seemingly as an anchor.

 _And it's you and me_

 _And all other people_

Their lips finally meet and even though Clarke has already figured that she absolutely is madly in love with her best friend, it feels like everything has clicked into place. Lexa's lips are soft and warm, and before she can kiss her any more her brain catches up. She feels how stiff Lexa has gone and realizes she's probably frightened her, so she breaks them apart slowly and looks towards her.

 _And I don't know why_

 _I can't keep my eyes off of you_

There's a stray tear that's managed to run down the brunette's cheek and her eyes slowly flutter open to stare back at Clarke. She brings her hand up to carefully wipe the wetness away and she smiles, hoping that it alleviates some of the disorientation. She's interrupted before she can even think of explaining herself.

* * *

Octavia has the both of you in a tight bear hug before she can even get a word out to ask Clarke what the hell just happened. (The strength of this tiny woman sometimes frightens Lexa).

" _Oh. My. God._ We've all been waiting for _so long_ to finally catch you guys. _So fucking long_ ".

She's still more than confused. She hasn't even gotten the chance to replay the feeling of Clarke's lips on her own because she's so bewildered and caught off guard. They've been waiting for so long? Lexa thinks the world must be ending because of what just happened. Soon enough there's another body barrelling into them and Lexa eyes the new suspect.

"Good God, finally seeing you two kiss makes me feel the "I think I'm gay" thing all over again". She squeezes her arms tighter and Lexa just wishes they'd go away so she can have some answers for her poor madly in love heart. "I can't believe you've been macking on each other for months on end and never told any of us".

It's getting too hot and all she wants is the comfort and peace she felt from being alone with Clarke. She chances a pleading look at the blonde who's pressed up against her almost uncomfortably because of their two friends desperately hanging on.

"Guys, can you give us a second?" she hears her say.

* * *

While Clarke leads her away from the crowd of people, hand linked with her own, she spares a glance around at the guests to find her sister again. She assumes the scared look on her face is all too telling because the brunette in the distance mouths an "Are you okay?" and makes the hand gesture to make sure her question gets across. Lexa doesn't even know how to respond because she can't choose only one feeling at the moment, so she settles on an unsure headshake signalling "Yes" (To which Anya outright laughs at her for).

(She hates her sister's inability to be serious sometimes).

When her front collides with a warm back she startles out of her jumbled thoughts (She's finally onto the fact that Clarke Griffin tastes like cherries and new beginnings) and realizes that they're standing in the room where they used to sleep when they were kids.

It's still decorated with their paint-dipped handprints and ten-year-old Clarke's drawings. The sight puts her at ease as she gazes around and spots photos of them together during their time spent here at the cottage.

"Lex?"

Clarke looks nervous and Lexa can't help but feel the sinking in the pit of her stomach. Clarke is regretting kissing her just moments earlier, so with a hurting heart she decides to bail her out of it. "It's okay Clarke, you don't have to apologize". She tries to give her a smile but she's sure the ache shows.

"Of course I do. I'm so fucking sorry that I didn't realize my feelings were anything more than friendly. We're not friends, Lex. Not anymore at least. Not with feelings like these. I just – every time someone so much as even just simply mentions you I feel it. This isn't how two people who are just friends are supposed to feel. This is so much more than that".

Lexa's pretty sure she needs someone to pinch her because this moment is even better than their kiss. Clarke Griffin is spilling out everything she's ever hoped for and _gosh_ she's so fucking beautiful.

"I wasted so much time trying to just get by after Finn and I'm tired. I don't want a half-assed love. You and I deserve so much better than that. Life should be about more than just surviving. We deserve to take a chance on this. It scares me how much I know I want to love you for the rest of my life but I get butterflies when I think about getting to be an 'us' through it all. I love you, Lex. I'm absolutely, undoubtedly –".

She's grinning so hard that her face hurts but she interrupts Clarke's spiel to kiss her anyway. This one is different. They're both sure and overcome with so much emotion that it's wonderfully passionate and Lexa thinks that she can mark Clarke's lips moving against her own as her new favourite feeling. She pulls back slightly so that their foreheads rest against one another but there's enough space between their lips to get her words out; she wants to finally tell Clarke.

There are hands holding her hips that almost burn with how perfect it feels, and her own are cupping the blonde's face. "I love you more than I thought it was possible to love anything at all. It consumes me and makes me want to be the best version of myself for you. Always. I can't imagine never having met you. I've been in love with you all my life".

She's so beyond elated that she wants to rush outside and scream to everyone that she loves this woman and that Clarke fucking Griffin is in love with her too.

(Everyone would yell back that they know).


End file.
